Episode 31 - How Being Vulnerable and Learning About Perimenopause and Hormones Can Change Our Lives | Brooke Siler

Nov 10, 2021
Episode 31 - How Being Vulnerable and Learning About Perimenopause and Hormones Can Change Our Lives | Brooke Siler
 

     

Being strong is admitting when you're not.”  - Brooke Siler

As business owners, we try to put on a brave face at all times even if we find ourselves struggling. We believe that we have no choice- that we have to put up and shut up, deal with it all ourselves and push on through regardless. That we are the glue that holds our businesses together and to admit how we feel will leave us looking weak or vulnerable. 

But as this week’s podcast guest, the incredible Pilates teacher and author, Brooke Siler shares, why vulnerability matters. 

If we truly want to achieve success and happiness in our lives and businesses, we need to be honest about how we feel, ask for help and perhaps most of all, be kind to ourselves. 

In this week’s episode, Brooke and I sit down for a refreshingly honest conversation about what it means to be a female business owner. We learn how Pilates helped her regain her best self amidst the problems she faced physically and emotionally, how our hormones can impact our power as entrepreneurs, the power of building genuine relationships and the healing benefits of Pilates. 

As the former owner of the award-winning Manhattan Studio re: AB Pilates, author of the New York Times’ Best Seller “The Pilates Body” and with big-name clients that include Kirsten Dunst and Kate Moss, Brooke certainly knows what she is talking about. 

Be inspired by Brooke as we shift our mindset, offer ourselves grace and appreciate just how much our body has done for us. 

Eleshia’s Essentials:

  • I need to unpack the things that I hadn’t been taught and recognize the things that my body needs.
  • In our late 30s, we start to see those hormonal shifts. It's really important for women to be informed and hear different stories as to how other people are affected.
  • Life is hard, and just having somebody to help you in those times of need is really important.

We also learned so many lessons from Brooke:

  • What you are not changing, you’re choosing.
  • Being strong is admitting when you're not.
  • You don't always have to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ at the moment someone asks you something. You can say, “You know what, let me think about that.”

Other resources mentioned

More about Brooke:

Brooke Siler began her Pilates training in 1994 under Joseph Pilates’ protégée Romana Kryzanowska at Drago’s Gym in New York City where she spent a decade studying under her masterful tutelage.

She opened her award-winning Manhattan studio, re: AB Pilates, in 1997 and was quickly embraced by Hollywood’s A-list from Madonna to Dustin Hoffman. One of her clients, actress Kirsten Dunst, gave a stellar review: “Brooke gave me the best workout I've ever had in my life!”

Brooke is best known for penning the New York Times’ best-seller The Pilates Body, which has become the best-selling Pilates book of all time. She has followed it with titles: Your Ultimate Pilates Body Challenge, The Pilates Body Kit, The Women’s Health Big Book of Pilates, and the Pilates Weight Loss for Beginners DVD. This summer Brooke launched her first Pilates apparatus, called the Tensatoner™️, designed to create a more connected practice.

Brooke has studied anatomy, physiology, kinesiology, fascial networks, and cadaver dissection with teachers such as Tom Myers (Anatomy Trains), chiropractic physician Dr Joe Muscolino (Know The Body), Leslie Kaminoff & Amy Matthews (Yoga Anatomy), and podiatrist Dr Emily Splichal, under whom she is a certified Barefoot Training Specialist™.

After moving to the UK in 2015 for her family, Brooke still teaches independent classes, workshops, courses, and conferences. She has remained at the forefront of the Pilates community for decades because she remains fiercely passionate, purposeful, and authentic in her work.

Connect with Brooke:

About the show:

Need simple strategies to help you grow your business and achieve more without working harder? Struggling to balance work, life, and all your other commitments and don’t want to burn out? You’re in the right place. 

The Eleshia Show is a holistic business and lifestyle strategy podcast to help you get clear on your business goals, stop procrastinating, boost your income, and do what lights you up. 

Women are taking notice! We have listeners across 37 countries and over 327 cities! We’re teaching female business owners across the world how to achieve more with less while looking after themselves. And we can do the same for you!

We’re having intimate conversations — the kinds that most female business owners are having privately. You don’t want to miss these.

Tune in to the podcast every Wednesday to discover exactly what expert CEOs did to get their businesses off the ground and achieve success so you can do the same! 

With your host, Eleshia Harris, business coach and growth strategist, you can redefine what success means, ditch the stress and confusion and learn how to run your business from a place of ease and excitement. 

If you want to talk business, wellbeing, lifestyle, mindset, goals, and scaling organic growth, don’t miss it!

Connect with Eleshia and the community today:

Show Transcript:

Eleshia Harris: Hey, I'm Eleshia Harris, and I am the host of The Eleshia Show where each week, we'll be having conversations about how to enhance your wellbeing. We'll be sharing strategies and stories and insights to build your business while still navigating life because sometimes we try to separate the two. And let's face it. If you are not well, you have no business. I am a holistic business growth strategist and a wellness coach who spent over 15 years in corporate before deciding to choose me first to build my brand, Eleshia Lifestyle. I'm here to teach you how to redefine what success means to you, ditch the stress and confusion, and learn how to run your business from a place of ease and excitement. Let's get into this week's episode.

Eleshia Harris: Brooke, I am so happy that you're here with me today. Oh my gosh. We have been trying to plan this forever. And this conversation is so important to me because you've been so important to my life and my growth over the last 18 months. The reason why I'm coming to that straight away is because, at the beginning of 2020, we didn't know anything, and we had met for the first time in 2018. I was going through my own fertility journey, and we met at the beginning of March. I know I've said this to you before. And then by the end of March, I had conceived. 

Brooke Siler: I have nothing to do with that, by the way. I did not get Eleshia pregnant. 

Eleshia Harris: No, you did not. But there were elements of our meeting that really opened up my eyes to more, with regards to where I was in my Pilates journey and just understanding more about my body from that workshop that we had done. And you, seeing me, you are actually taking into consideration my body type and who I was. And that was really important to me. And I knew, you know, I remember reading what you wrote in my book. And I was like, oh my gosh, if I get to play again, that would be absolutely awesome. And then we get to 2020, and we have been pretty much together at least twice a week.

Brooke Siler: In the beginning, we were five times a week. Yes. 

Eleshia Harris: So when you reached out to me and a few others, at first, it just felt so surreal. It felt so surreal because it was like, wow, we're going to work out with Brooke. And we laugh and joke about this all the time about calling you, Brooke in the third, you know, Brooke in the third person. Yes, full name. But that's how it felt. In the beginning, it was like, wow. 

Brooke Siler: And now it was like, oh God, Brooke. 

Eleshia Harris: No, not at all. You know, not at all. And I remember I would get up half at seven, push Elessandra in one of the bedrooms with Darren and say, I'm working out with my Pilates ladies. And that really helped me with my physical health, my mental health, and just get through the last 18 months. And you know that we've had really deep conversations about a lot of things that have come up for me. And so, I just want you to know that. And you know this because I tell you this, but I just want you to know that I appreciate everything. I appreciate everything that we've done together, but I also appreciate the fact that our paths met. 

Brooke Siler: Definitely grateful for that. And I just want to say that point, one of the many things that I love about you is you always let me know how you appreciate it. And you don't just say the words, you show it. You are that person of integrity and character and a heart, and I adore you. And I'm so glad that there is a part of me that has a good sense sometimes and the good intuition sometimes to know who speaks to me, who speaks to my heart. And right from the get-go, your smile, your attitude toward when we were doing the work, I just fell in love with you from the get-go.

And so on the part that you leave out, which is that you were the one pushing me because you wanted to do training. You were like, Brooke, come on, we're going to do something together. You say it like, I just suddenly came up with this idea and called you and said, hey, Eleshia, let's work out. But you were definitely, you're amazing that way. You were like, let's do something, that we were originally before lockdown talking about doing some training together where you and some of the other ladies would come down to my place and we would play together. And so with lockdown, it was really just me turning around and going like, well, wait a minute. Why do we have to not, in fact, we had dates even in the book. 

Eleshia Harris: We did have dates. 

Brooke Siler: We forgot that we did. And so then it was just a matter of like, well, why should we not do that? Let's just do it on zoom. And who knew what Zoom was? I never heard of Zoom. Was there a Zoom? I can't even remember, it feels like there's a land before zoom. But I think possibly there was. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. There was definitely a Zoom. They have done pretty well.

Brooke Siler: Oh, wow. Talk about capitalizing on an opportunity. Look what we've gotten out of it. 

Eleshia Harris: I think all of the friendships, and it's more than just Pilates. 

Brooke Siler: Oh my God. Yes. 

Eleshia Harris: Would never have blossomed so much. And even just as I was saying, I'd fallen out of love with Pilates, to be honest with you. I had fallen out of the movement aspect. I had fallen in love with just the whole industry in itself. And you have sparked so much joy and so much more interest and passion again because I decided to take it. Well, I didn't decide. Well, I guess I did decide. Basically, what happened was my clients started to get zoom fatigue. And I was just like, you know what, I am going to step back and just take some time for myself, and really just enjoy the fact that I've got this amazing teacher who is giving me all of her everything with regards to letting me ask questions and telling me what is good for my body. Just unpacking some of the things that I hadn't been taught, and just really recognizing that my body is my body, and doing the things that I needed for my body.

Brooke Siler: Absolutely. Yes, like you said in the beginning about being seen. I think that that's the thing. There's a problem when a program, I don't think they're built to see people, they're built to take people through something. So a lot of people come out of programs and feel like, huh, now what? How does that relate to me? I'm definitely a more individual person. I like the people part, the individual relationships are what is more interesting to me. But really, as we both know and I've said over and over and over again, all of us getting together, yes, fine. Maybe it was sparked initially by this idea of training or retraining in Pilates, but it really wasn't. It was about accountability to one another. Everybody's saying, I really need to work out more, do more. And it became our daily ritual. It really became a really wonderful way to connect with one another, and learn and we've developed these friendships now that are so special. And they were born from this, just wake up, turn on zoom and be together and move.

And as we know, sometimes it was a few minutes of talking before we would move. Sometimes it was mostly talking and not moving. We had the benefit of five days a week to do that. And then, I realized most of the way through or X amount of months into it that I was not personally doing and not having the equipment. It was really a struggle for me too. My body just wasn't loving some of the shapes that it needed to make to keep us all on the same page. So the next act had to be like, well, got to get everyone the equipment then. 

Eleshia Harris: And that's another key point because, again, in that sense, just that generosity, it took me six months, Brooke. You told me to come and collect. You told me when we got in that place where we were able just to quickly come out, you were like, come and get the equipment.

Brooke Siler: Well, you still had your equipment. So it wasn't like a blank space. You had something to work with. 

Eleshia Harris: I had something to work with but It was interesting because the dimensions weren't the best for me. 

Brooke Siler: It was not right for your body. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes, for me. And also just from the perspective of just seeing you all work on the apparatus. Just seeing that, but it took me six months. And I think that was me, not trusting the process. From a perspective, you've already given us so much and then you then say, come and collect the equipment. And I'm like, I own, and it's not my equipment and all of those things. So I am really proud of myself for actually just coming over that barrier of growth as well as being open to do that. But I'm also really thankful that you would just like, I've got bleachers, I'm just going to drop it down.

Brooke Siler: That's right, actually. Yes, it was not taking no for an answer. The equipment will arrive at your flat. You can be there to meet it. 

Eleshia Harris: So thank you for always persevering. It means a lot to me. Because as I said, I've not always had a great journey with regards to being in this industry, but in any industry. So it really means a lot when somebody like you, sees and listens. We do a lot of listening. 

Brooke Siler: Yes, we do a lot of listening. I love that. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes, it's very good, good faith. So anyway, like we said before we even started, we can speak for hours. So I know so much about you already. But you know, you're a New Yorker in the UK. Especially last year, how was that for you? 

Brooke Siler: In general, it's been quite a transition. I'm born and raised in New York City, right by the United Nations. That's my home. When other people come and visit New York City, they see Rockefeller Center, let's say, as a tourist place. And I see it as where I went with my mother every Sunday to ice skate and pick up bagels or something. That's a part of my life. It's a part of who I am. And growing up with all that, it's a lot of energy, it's a lot of noise. It's really comfortable for me. I used to have trouble sleeping when there was no noise. I'd be like, oh, what are you supposed to do when there are no sirens going by? 

Eleshia Harris: That is so weird because whenever I used to go and visit my cousin, I was like, this is so noisy. 

Brooke Siler: Right. I think it's hard to come by, but you don't realize that it's hard to go from the other way too. So you go to the country and you're like, it's so quiet. Being quiet is not a good thing in this city. When it's quiet, there's probably a problem. So when we moved here, we moved to this little Hamlet, which doesn’t give the location. But I'm in this little quiet village and I thought, oh gosh, how am I going to do this? So the first X amount of years were really hard because wherever you go, there you are. It wasn't like I just left New York and come here. I brought it with me. It was in me. And everything I had left, whether it was finished or unfinished, it all came with me including, and this is the physical side of it, all the Pilates equipment that lived in my garage for all those years. I came here with this idea that I no longer want to be the Pilates Body author, business owner, the Brooke Siler, the full menu girl. coming here to be a mom, to be a woman. I started Pilates on my Pilates journey when I was 26 years old. I arrived here when I was 48 years old, I'm 53 now. So I was like, pushing more than half my life trying to figure out, who am I without all of that? Again, I cannot remember what I used to love to do. And what was interesting was when I stopped the Pilates, and I did. And granted, I'm a little extreme. I think we know this about me. So instead of just saying, I'll do a little bit of Pilates, but I'll explore other things. I just was like, no. No, Pilates. I'm not doing Pilates anymore. That equipment will stay in my garage and I'm going to see what comes out. So that was a hard period. I put on a lot of weight. I broke bones. I've never broken a bone before other than having my toes stepped on by a horse. Yes, it's part of it, of course, when you're a horseback rider. I broke a bone. I just started realizing my body really did not love not doing Pilates. 

But my intention in coming here was to move away from the physical and explore more. I did start doing art and painting again, which a lot of my background had in it, so that was really great for me. I thought, for sure, that I was going to come and write a novel or something. But that hasn't happened yet. And then what was so interesting, and I did start working out again right before lockdown, about the six months before with my friend, Charlie, who I always talk about. He would show up at my door every morning at 6:00 AM, and we'd do our workouts five days a week. But the weight wouldn't move off of me. And we've talked about this before, and we can get more into it. But for sure, the perimenopause, I've been rolling in and through and around this for years, part of the stress of leaving New York. And I don't really know. You'll probably answer this better than I know how to. But whether it was the stress that kicked up in the perimenopause or whether the perimenopause, it's like a big knot. 

Eleshia Harris: But there was just so much going on. 

Brooke Siler: So much. But hormonally, I really, really, really, really struggled before I left New York, and then have hit pockets of that also. It's been even a big journey just those six years since I moved here. I've been through a lot. Again, that's turning my back on Pilates or movement really. I did join the gym, but I wasn't doing it, just having all that weight on my body. I'm just not someone who is used to that. And I was uncomfortable. I also couldn't shift and I was like, I've changed my body so many times before. How am I not able to shift it this time? and took a lot. But then, part of that was during the lockdown. We started moving together all the time. And I was okay in the beginning. Again, my extremism kicked in and I was doing four and five hours a day.

Yes, I know. I know. And then I leveled out, now, it's like the pendulum. It swings, it swings, and then you try to find that middle. So I'm always trying to find that. I'm pretty prone to flying off in all directions. It's just the way I'm built. I'm working with that.  And then things started shifting. And what was amazing for me was not only redeveloping my love for Pilates in particular, that movement, but through you guys. Because what I realized is this was not a rude awakening. I think I always knew it but I never would. I didn't have the words for it, but I'm not a self-motivated person. That is a lot to say because certainly, everyone believes that. Everyone projects onto people, especially fitness people who they are and how they operate. And many of them are disciplined and they come from maybe dance backgrounds, or some sort of discipline background.

And it took me a long time to realize like, you know what, actually, if given my freedom to just get up and come and work out, I don't. If I know that I have people to meet, to come on online and be with, you guys were my incentive for getting up. I didn't even have one day where I was like, oh, I don't want to do this. It never even crossed my mind. I just wanted to see you guys. I was just excited to be with you. 

Eleshia Harris: Exactly that. But again, I talk a lot about external accountability. And people don't actually realize that they need that. 

Brooke Siler:  It's freedom. There's a freedom in doing it, recognizing it, or whatever verbiage you want to use, coming to the realization that like, actually I work better when I'm not only with others, but I really enjoyed the leading. And all I was doing really was working out and talking out loud, and then looking over and being like, Eleshia, more foot. 

Eleshia Harris: I know. And always say to you like, how are you? There are these upper boxes there. Your eyes are like a laser. I can't even get the words out right now. But you are able to see everything. But I guess once you know what you're looking for, I would just sometimes just do my own thing in my own little world, and then I'd hear your voice and I'll be like, oh. 

Brooke Siler: She's looking in my box. I think part of that is my artistic background. I was a figure drawer. For me, you have to look to see negative spaces and the positives. You're looking for shapes. You're looking for lines. And so that's what my eye naturally gravitates towards. There's no judgment in it. That's what I'm comfortable with, there's no judgment. I'm literally looking at shapes. If you were to put the glasses on better in my head, on my way of looking, you would just see less geometric shapes and physics and leverage. You'll see a lot of equations going on. 

Eleshia Harris: But that's the lovely thing about what you just said. There's no judgment. We were just moving. We were all just doing what we needed to do to get by. 

Brooke Siler: You get vitamins, how amazing. And then I always loved that the natural by-product is that we all got stronger. We all got fairer. We all dropped weight. All of these things naturally happen. That wasn't why we were moving. We were going to be together and to take care of all the anxiety that was coming up and everything else that arose last year, and all the regular stuff that arises on a daily basis. And just having that outlet, if we needed a minute and just laughed, that's so important. 

Eleshia Harris: It is. And just the community, just building that community to know that you're being held in a safe space where if you rocked up one day... 

Brooke Siler: Grumpy or whatever.

Eleshia Harris: Yes. We were there for all of it. I want to go back to what you mentioned about perimenopause because we're both in it. So I think people don't always know that once we get to a certain age, usually typically in our late 30s, that's when we start to see those hormonal shifts. I just think it's really important for people to be informed and to hear different stories as to how other people are affected. So when it started, you were still running your business? 

Brooke Siler: Yes, I was in my mid-40s. And my mother who had already passed. She had multiple sclerosis. So I don't think a lot of any symptoms she would have had around perimenopause were probably masked by her MS symptoms. So it wasn't really a discussion we had ever had. I had no idea what was coming. Of course, I heard of menopause. I had never heard of perimenopause. I definitely had no idea even what either of those things entailed. I certainly did not expect that I’ll hit me like a ten-ton truck. But wow, and again, I was still, I'm not going to say in denial because you don't know what you don't know. I didn't know so I couldn't have known. I was convinced that it was the stress of closing my business, the stress of marital issues, the stress of having two kids, one with ADHD. I thought it was the regular stress. And suddenly, I must just be full because I'm not handling it very well anymore. That's what I thought it was. And I went to every doctor you can think of. Now, I'm in New York City at that time so I have access to everybody. And I took advantage of that. I went to everybody. I did everything holistic, organic, I went Western. I went Eastern. I did everything. I was putting powders of mushrooms in my mind. Honestly, Eleshia, I tried it all. And I was diagnosed with everything. Adrenal fatigue, you have high yeast. Oh my God. One guy, an old doctor in New York, so I think everyone goes through and he does the same thing. He sticks his finger up your butt, he tells you that you got parasites. I kid you not! He's like a thousand years old. I am quite convinced that everybody, in fact, his little doctor's room they went into, could have been in a museum. It had all of the old, everything from Norman Rockwell's pictures, paintings of what an old doctor's office was. This guy, I'm not joking, he was in his room and I don't know what he stuck up there. But he used everyone for the same treatment. I was referred to him by my friend who had the same thing. Apparently, everyone in New York City has the parasite. Listen, nothing changed. When I say I tried it, I went to acupuncture. I tried every powder that every new doctor, everyone knew what was wrong with me. Everyone knew until three months later when it came back and then they didn't know what to do with me anymore. I went to psychology. I went to psychiatry. Honestly, that's the way I deal with things. I'm like, let me try everything. And I did, and not all at once, I did one thing at a time. Just to be clear. That's my pendulum swing. 

One thing at a time. And each thing helped a little bit in the beginning. And then a month or so later, I was like, oh, I still feel awful. When I say I feel awful, I mean crying jags and anxiety and panic attacks, and not being able to get out of bed, feeling dysfunctional, feeling that you can't handle normal life. That insecurity at the highest point, not being able to handle even small interactions that maybe are not smooth. A little something going wrong feels huge. All those things and they were just piling. And then when you own a business, and we have hundreds of clients, I have 20 employees and you're trying to be there for everyone, but you're dying inside really. You're trying to put on a brave face and everyone says to you, it's going to be okay, and just chin up. And you're just like, wow, what is wrong with me? That's the line that kept running through my head. What is wrong with me? And then one day, I was training a woman who used to be a nurse. And she said, you need to go to this woman. I've been hearing this over, everyone was sending me to someone else. And I went to everybody that I was referred to. She sent me to this woman and went into her office. She had a women's clinic, and I went in and I sat down and I bawled my story out as I did in 20 other doctors. And I say, I don't know what's wrong with me. And she went, oh honey. She said, you are so in the middle of perimenopause. And I was like, what is that? It was the first time I heard those words. I'd been diagnosed with low thyroid, I had Hashimoto's and everything. But I had never heard those words, perimenopause. I was like, what is that? And she's like, you just need some hormones. And she just slapped an estrogen patch on my stomach.

Now, I will say again, it works and it works for a little bit longer but it was not a cure-all. And it's really important to know that also. It helped, I was taking thyroid, progesterone, estrogen, testosterone. They rub between your thighs and then they say, make sure your husband's not in there too long. When he sees it, he's going to get it. Just remember all these things. I was like, is this happening to all women? You would think you'd have a network of people to talk to, but everyone goes through it differently. 

Eleshia Harris: Exactly. But we wouldn't want to talk. 

Brooke Siler: I know. I just thought, oh, okay. So I'll just take it. I've heard of hormone replacement, of course. I'd heard of them and all of that. And so I was doing the bioidentical hormones and I had a clinic that was giving me the pig thyroid, the bio-identical ones. You had to have that. Honestly, all by the way are at the same time as trying to run a business. Everything is happening at the same time and you're just hanging on like this. And again, my mom was not alive, and the kids, the marriage, it's just ahhh. I was really at my wit's end. And then moving, the move was for me, what was to be my salvation. I'm moving so that I can, you know, I like to say this line to you all the time. But I had read, "What you are not changing, you are choosing." 

Eleshia Harris: It's true.

Brooke Siler: And so I was like, okay, something needs to change and there are many reasons why. But I chose to move and come to England. And when I got here, as I said, I brought everything with me so I was still feeling stuff. I still had to switch my medications when I got here, because a lot of other ones I was taking in America, we don't have here, so we needed to change. I was on an antidepressant that was specific to people going through perimenopause because I wasn't getting a lot of the physical symptoms that come along with perimenopause. I was having more of the emotional ones. And so the doctor, and again, I wasn't with a specialist. It's just the NHS GNC. She was looking up the names of things as well. And I was like, oh, this is interesting. Very different from my private medical experience back in New York. So I was like, well, I'll go with it though. And honestly, she put me on thyroid medication. I'm on Thyroxine and I was on Venlafaxine, which was the name of the antidepressant or anti-anxiety. I didn't realize that this was interesting to me. So I was like, I don't think I'm depressed. But I am definitely anxious and I do get really low. And so apparently, they're really two sides of the same coin, which I didn't know. So a lot of doctors have said, well, it's the same thing. Anti-anxiety and antidepressants are the same things. And I was like, they seem different to me, but guess, medically, they're not. So different in how they're treated, and I'm not an expert. I'm only an expert in me. 

Eleshia Harris: Exactly. 

Brooke Siler: If that, I don't even know that. I'm still learning. 

Eleshia Harris: But you took the time to try and figure it out. 

Brooke Siler: I'm definitely not someone that like, a loss isn't going to grow on me. I'm like, something's happening. I need to do something about it. Sometimes it's a little over-reactive, sometimes I do wait a little bit. But then I'm like, because I try to see how much I can tolerate. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. I would say that's definitely a female/ woman thing. That's what we do. We hear it all the time. Are you struggling? 

Brooke Siler: You know what I've learned is being strong is admitting when you're not. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. Strongest thing. God, right now, I'm really falling apart. I'm not afraid to say it. That's actually strong. And you're not afraid for people to see it.

Brooke SIler: No, not anymore. I think originally, you wanted, especially as a business owner, you walk into the business. People are looking up to you. You really are trying to put on a brave face. And also, as someone who is as sensitive as I am, I was always, I'm going to say criticized, I don't know if that's the right word. It was always pointed out to me how sensitive I was and how much I would cry about things. It wasn't necessarily in the best light that people would point those things out to me. So I learned that those weren't okay behaviors. Showing my emotion wasn't good. And then I started going like, actually, you're the one that's uncomfortable with my emotion. I'm fine with it. 

Eleshia Harris: And I think, you and I are both the same, we have both empaths. We're very sensitive to a lot of the things that happened and that are happening, and so forth. And so what you just said really resonated with me because I cry at the drop of a hat, and that's just my way of releasing.

Brooke Siler: Releasing, exactly. I always say that there's a reason we have tear ducts. If we're not supposed to cry, then somebody messed up by putting those in there. It is absolutely a societal thing. And again, one of the things I have to add too is I'm probably in year 15. I think with my, I don't know what to call her, I call her my teacher really. She's, I guess, a counselor but she's a Buddhist nun who I studied with, I guess. But she said it's like counting. For all intents and purposes, she's my therapist, except for that she comes from a place of, her lens is through Buddhism.

So when we work on things, we work from the place of the heart. We stop, and we take a breath. And that's not something that you get in classical therapy. Although now, people are more open to it, I've done the regular therapy group. And when I found her, it was really, that was a game-changer for me. So she's been with me through all of this. And it is so important to have that talk therapy and to be able to cry, to have a release. So that was my way of solving the problem. 

The regular people in my life don't really want to be cried too, even though that's the way I express myself, that it makes them uncomfortable. So I'll find somebody who I have to pay, but it doesn't mind and understands that that's just the way I release tension in my body. Some people go for a run, some people punch people, some people drink. Everybody's got their thing. But for me, tears are my way of, literally, I've been paying more attention to how it feels in my body. And oftentimes, I think the part, if I were to try to ask someone to have clarity around what I would say, it's not a sign of weakness. For God's sake. And when I'm crying, I'm not not in control. I just need, that is my body that needs to release this way. And because of all the stigmas that your parents told you and society tells you to don't cry or go sit in the court or whatever it is, you're a cry baby. Because of that, you're uncomfortable with me showing feelings. But this is what I need to do for myself. And one of the things what my Buddhist woman taught me was if you're in a moment where you feel like it's coming and you just know that you're not in the right scenario of setting or the people are not going to be receptive or it's going to shut down the conversation, you can always excuse yourself to go to the restroom. And I was like, oh yes. I never thought I could excuse myself. Yes, I guess I can. That was big. Also, she taught me that you don't always have to say yes or no at the moment when someone asks you something. You can say, you know what, let me think about that. I know it sounds so simple, but I didn't know how to do that. 

Eleshia Harris: But we need those simple things. 

Brooke SIler: We need those simple things. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes, we need those because life is hard. And just having somebody else who is external, again, to help you in those times of need is really, really important.

Brooke Siler: I love this empath hacks. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. I love that. 

Brooke Siler: What to do when you're an empath, don't answer yes or no right away. Excuse yourself. Take a moment. Go cry. I don't know if you ever saw, there was a movie called Broadcast News with an actress named Holly Hunter. 

Eleshia Harris: I don't think I've seen this. 

Brooke SIler: It is before your time. Anyway, she's this intense news producer. So she's the producer of all these news anchors and she's writing the stories and producing them. She is just this intense character. She happens to also be a pretty intense actress. But what I loved about her character was every morning, you see her sitting and she's got a telephone. This was on the day of the corded telephone. She takes the telephone off the receiver off the hook and she turns it sideways so you can't call. And she sits and she just starts crying. And she just cries hysterically for a solid minute, and then she just stops. And then she puts the phone back on the hook and she goes in about her day. And in the movie, you'd see her do that every morning. And I always thought it was just like a funny bit in the movie, but then I started to realize like, oh my God, actually that's brilliant. Because it's the same, probably, for someone who gets up and goes for a run, or for us to get up and do our Pilates. It's all about releasing energy that is built up in the body from our emotions that often don't have a release. And if they don't get released, where do they go? And do they cause? I've always believed they caused this illness in the body. 

Eleshia Harris: Ditto. And I think that's why it's been so important for me to work on myself over the last 18 months. It's just, as you said, you know the backstory about my mom, the listeners know as well. But just not holding onto that trauma, not just holding onto things. And as you said, let them expand in the body. It's really important. So if you need to cry, if you need to do all of those things, do it and don't excuse yourself from anybody. 

Brooke Siler: I had people who, when I was teaching them. And like to think it's because I bring energy with me that says, absolutely be vulnerable with me. I enjoy it. I'd rather see someone be raw than fake. I just don't really respond well to them. So I've had clients cry and be like, I'm so sorry, I'm crying. And I'm like, oh no, I'm honored that you're crying. You must feel safe with me in order to cry. So it's such a flattery thing. If you can cry to me. 

Eleshia Harris: I cried. We've been working out and I've just been... 

Brooke Siler: And you know, I do. 

Eleshia Harris: And I love the fact that we don't even have to excuse ourselves. We just have to get it out. 

Brooke Siler: No, move on. Just keep going. It's part of everything. It's just so stigmatized. 

Eleshia Harris: Exactly. So when did you start to feel things were leveling out a little bit for you with regards to the ups and downs?

Brooke Siler: Well, really, in terms of leveling out, so here's what is interesting is I was on that medication for a while and then I was still not feeling great. I wasn't having manic mood swings because I didn't own a business anymore. I live a quiet life. I don't have sirens going. I did find that if a friend called me from New York and she was walking on the street, I had to get off the phone because my nerves just couldn't even take that energy. It was really like, it would go right through my system. I felt it just rounded so tight in my body. But when I found the medication, I was like, it doesn't seem to be helping. I still feel really low. I still feel a bit lost. I'm not quite sure what I'm doing. Okay, yes, fine, I've removed one set of issues. But now, what? It wasn't like everything just fixes like, yep, left New York. Everything's fine now. It's like now I was like, oh, now what? So I sat in that place for a while and I started realizing that the medications weren't fixing me. So I started weaning off of them very slowly because you don't ever stop. Especially an antidepressant, you don't just stop it cold. So I gave myself a year to wean off, and I literally had a calendar and I weaned off days deeply. And I was taking vitamins instead. 

Yes, I was making food my medicine, and just trying to... Here's what's crazy, and I can not figure this out. So when I came here, I had a low thyroid. They told me basically, you pretty much have Hashimoto's. You have basically no thyroid. It's really normal for women your age. So I went up to a place that he said, do you want me to take a biopsy to see if there's any thyroid there? I said, yes, or not a biopsy. Whatever they do, a little whatever. He did a test where he actually tested to see how much thyroid I have left. He said barely any, so I'm hypothyroid. Except for that, this Eleshia, I'm not on any thyroid medication. I'm not on any medication anymore other than for my connective tissue. And my tests are normal. Why is my thyroid suddenly normal? You can't regrow a thyroid. I was told. I said to the guy, can I regrow it? He said, no, you can't regrow your thyroid. So fine, maybe I haven't regrown it. But why are my tests normal now? I don't understand at all, but okay. I don't care. I'm like, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. I just feel better so I'm good. 

Eleshia Harris: You're doing what you need to do. 

Brooke Siler: Yes, and Pilates has really changed everything. Getting back into my body, but in a way that it's not just the Pilates, it's with you guys. It's being with you, that's when things started leveling out, honestly. It took until, you know, fine, starting with Charlie. That was definitely helpful. But the weight, I wasn't shifting the weight. And it wasn't until lockdown that I started being able to just really, I was opening in but out at the same time, like you guys into my world. And that was really helpful for me to have.

And so that's where I started leveling out. And yes, as you know, I've had some serious crazy crashes. Not a ton, but I’m definitely back in Pilates. I forgot what that's called, but that thing I definitely had a serious crash. And I wouldn't say I feel completely stable because I am still going through it. I still get my period whenever it feels like it, but I still get it. So I'm not in menopause. And I have no idea how long it'll last. But what I'm doing is I'm paying attention. I'm honouring, and I learned this word, gentle. I'm trying to be gentle with myself during those times when things are particularly tough. And I'm saying like, okay, Brooke. Yup,  things are tough right now and you're okay. And you have wonderful resources. You've got women around you who understand what you're going through and who see you. And I know that you're there, even if we're not talking. And you're fine. Really, I just keep saying like, my favorite thing is, "It'll all be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end." That John Lennon quote.

And that's what I just keep saying is like, it's okay. It's still funny how I was speaking to a friend the other day and I said, oh, I said I'm hoping so much in, I just want to cry. And she said, oh, it'll be okay. And I said, no, no, it's already okay. I said, I'm not hopeless or helpless. I'm just feeling a lot. And sometimes you just have to say like, wow, I'm feeling a lot of things right now. And giving yourself space to feel those while not stopping. I think a lot of people, I just heard the shadow voice in my head of people I know would be like, oh, who's got the time for that? Who's got the time for all those feelings? And it's like, well, who has the time not to have those?

Eleshia Harris: Exactly. And I think you've touched on a really good point. And you know that I always think that it starts with you, but you took that time to actually listen and believe and focus on yourself inside out. You have to make the time.

Brooke Siler: Yes, you have to. And you have to champion yourself because if you don't do it, nobody else is going to do it. Really, even the people you think are your nearest and dearest, they're not going to. Because everybody is projecting their own fears, ideas, wishes, and whatever onto the rest of the world, including you. So even the people who you think have your best interests at heart, the only person that really has your best interest at heart is you. So if you don't start saying you're okay to yourself, no one else can do that. I'm 53 years old. It's taken me a long time to realize that I need to do that for me. And what I realized was I was collecting people in my life who made me feel, okay, what do they say? Nobody can make you feel a certain way. But I was selecting people who absolutely were not sympathetic to me being an empathic kind of person. And even if they pretended they were, they weren't really. They couldn't really deal with it, it's like when shit hits the fan.

But I realized that the reason I was pulling those people to me was because that made me stand up more. So actually, having toughies in my life wasn't actually about trying. I always thought, oh, I'm going to try to be like them. I'm going to cry less and do more. And then I was like, oh, that's not working for me. I don't actually operate that way. And you know what, it's not working for them either. But they're so used to it, they don't know another way. Exactly, I know, but that's a whole nother podcast. But what I realized was like, actually, and it's a painful process, but recognizing that, having those people reminded me that like, wow, that doesn't work for me. And so, I'm going to actually stand up against that, and not for arguments’ sake or conflict’s sake but because I need to stand up for myself. 

Eleshia Harris: Again, that resonates so much because I've had to release relationships over the last 18 months. I've had to really recognize that I have to believe in my worth, and I need to believe in myself. And I also need to ensure that the people around me respect me and they see me and they hear me and that they're there for me. And if they're not, or if it's just superficial then we can't be friends. 

Brooke Siler: No, not in the same way. I've witnessed it. It's so cool because I've been with you so much for so long now. I mean, not so long, but it feels like. 

Eleshia Harris: Two years. It's been a long time. 

Brooke Siler: Yes, I love that. I've not only witnessed the change in you, but you have taken it to new levels. It's impressive. You are an impressive human. Oh, whatever you are. You are, I told you this, you are. Some people can just recognize some things and they start paying attention, but they're not. Absolutely, once you got it, you got it. Who cares how long it takes you to get there? Once you get it, you get it. And then look at what you have done with it. There's that too. You turned around and started giving back, and that is another conversation you and I have had, which is a route. Service isn't just about what serves you, it's about how to then, once you are helping yourself, how can you also help others? And you are that person. And I have watched you. If you think about it, it's like warp speed because it hasn't been that long. That it took you to, I feel like I remember conversations from last year with you when you were struggling with friends going like, oh. And then you started honoring yourself. And then there's like this warrior goddess in you that's like, this is... 

Eleshia Harris: But I think, and I'm like, you can hear by my voice that I'm weepy. But just, again, having our community has helped and been able to just have those sometimes really hard conversations, Brooke. We've had some really hard conversations, and sometimes we didn't work out. Especially last year, when we were all in the midst of things that were happening within our own industry but even beyond that. Sometimes we didn't work out. Sometimes we discussed things at the moment. 

Brooke Siler: They were emotional workouts. 

Eleshia Harris: They were emotional workouts. 

Brooke Siler: Absolutely, and we all agreed. They were equally important as anything we have done physically. 

Eleshia: They were so important. So I felt like I was in that safe space where I didn't have to just be there for a workout. I could be like, this is happening and it's shit. These are the things that I think need to be looked at and changed, and so forth. And I could come to you guys without any judgment, without any defense. There was none of that.

Brooke Siler: We're just sharing our experience of what we were going through that week, that day, that minute. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. I was allowed that space. So you guys were like my free therapy last year as well. 

Brooke SIler: Definitely. It still is. We're talking like it's all in the past. We worked out like an hour ago.

Eleshia Harris: We're going to talk about that in a moment. So I needed that. I needed to feel held to be able to do everything that I needed to do. So our workouts and you reaching out were the catalyst. I need movement. I know what I need for my body to be in a place where I can then serve and give back. I need to make sure that I move and I'm hydrated and nourished, and that I have family time and I have good friends around me. I know that's what I need. So the fact that I was able to pause, a lot of us were able to pause last year. I'm really focused on that. That was golden to me. And also, knowing that I had skilled a skill set that could help other business owners in the place where they were spiraling. 

Brooke Siler: You made a really good point, which is that you said, I knew what I needed. And I think that a lot of us, sometimes, we know what we need but how we accomplish that is very different. And just to tie that into what you were about to say which is, you brought your business background to your Eleshia Lifestyle. You did this summer school and were gracious enough to let me in. And it was such an incredible experience for me because I came in thinking it was going to be one thing like we're going to have homework assignments. And I wasn't afraid of that. I was a little like, oh God, am I able to get it done? But I was like, I still thought like that's what it was going to be, and it wasn't. It was much more about like your ethos is, which is to see the whole person and to nurture the wellbeing of the human or the woman, the businesswoman. And that's what fosters the business. What was so interesting is everything that I had come into it to get done, got done without the homework assignments. And just like you had us write things down so we could see our goals, they were tangible. I think that whole idea of like, we know what we need, but we don't always know how we're going to give it to ourselves. I think we've seen that and that I know that I need to work out every day. But I also know that if you guys cancel on me, I'm not going to work out all day. I know that. So I need you guys, and I have said that to you a million. 

Every time you would say, thank you, and I'm like, and thank you because, without you, I would not be doing this either. So I think creating what we need is really where the niches are because you come in and you really help people figure out what do I need and how am I going to accomplish that? So we all have all these ideas buzzing in our heads. But, I think, coming from your background, you have that unique skill set to really, for me anyway, it really worked. That I was like, oh, you made it concrete. You grounded, a lot of my thoughts are up here but you grounded them into something real. And then I was able to accomplish those things. So I was super grateful. But I think that point of, I'm sure there's a lot of people listening who are like, oh, I know what I need. I know I need to work out every day. I know I need to eat better foods. I know I need to take vitamins. But how do you get there? And I think, for us, we learned that the network that we created has been a huge part of that. And then also, things like that you offer. You specifically offer, really is helpful as well. 

Eleshia Harris: Thank you so much for saying that.

Brooke Siler: You know that I never say what I don't believe in. I have to believe it. And that if I didn't believe it, I couldn't say it. 

Eleshia Harris: I know. That is such a great segue into our workout this morning. Can we talk about Tony, please? 

Brooke Siler: We can. Can you believe that? How naughty. We left him in the living room. 

Eleshia Harris: Well, in your photo. So let's talk about Tony because we did such an amazing workout this morning. I'm lucky enough that I have my Tony already. But again, that goes back to, as you said, when you were at summer school, we were working through everything and just getting you ready for this time as well. 

Brooke Siler: Absolutely. 

Eleshia Harris: So yes, we did an amazing workout this morning. And I cannot wait for everybody to get Tensatoners because... 

Brooke Siler: This is part of me that feels like it's not the calm before the storm, but it's like that I'm trying to hold onto the joy of this moment in time. It's actualized in the bigger world because at the moment, he's still private... And I sit on my living room floor and create, and then I bring it to you guys and I'm like, what do you think? How does this feel? And I love that whole process. And the thing is it's like a party or a club. Once those doors open, the rush of the energy from everybody else and people wanting this or wanting that. The wanting, I'm partially feeling a little like, okay, breathe, breathe, breathe. Because that is going to happen. So as we know, I'm really preparing myself as much as I can by doing as much of the logistics or the logistical work now. Because I know that come November, I would love to just be able to sit back and enjoy it rather than feeling inundated. So I'm still in a bit of a holding pattern, but I'm trying to enjoy and be like, Brooke, change your perspective from a place of anxiety to a place of like, there's actually so much cool stuff out there right now.

Eleshia Harris: So much cool stuff. Every time we get to play, actually every exercise that we did today, I was like, oh my goodness. And then I would get up and I'd be like, Brooke, do you know how amazing that felt? You're a genius. I kept on saying it, but those small intrinsic muscles, I don't want to use.

Brooke Siler: No. What I like is I'm on the journey with you guys. I may be doing X amount of hours more than a day because whatever, that's what I get to do. But I'm on the journey with you, and I love that. I love that. That's what gives me the most joy is the creative process. And then sharing, that is the best for me. I don't say, I don't care about the sales, but I really don't. Again, that's like a byproduct of everything for me. Everything in my life has been that way. I don't go into it from that angle. I come in from the, what's giving me excitement and what can I share with others? Whatever that yields. 

Eleshia Harris: And I think that's, again, another important factor because you and I have talked about this previously. The fact that it's such a good teaching tool. 

Brooke Siler: The chance to tone her in general. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. 

Brooke Siler: Yes, it is. We call it, he. He's more than I even dreamed. I knew I had an intuition about all the things he could do, but I admit, I had no idea. Like it's awesome, I love that. I love that I'm learning from this piece that I designed.

Eleshia Harris: Exactly, because if you think about it, this has been nine years in the making. And now, looking down during 2020, you were thinking about, well, you were working on this. 

Brooke Siler: So I've been talking about it for years with Charlie. He sees it, he makes things. And I was like, could you make this for me? But it really wasn't. I don't know how much longer it would have been floating in the ether. I do think that, like you said about us meeting up, I think some things are predestined, or not pre-destined but I think opportunities arise and we either see them and take advantage of them, or they pass by and they come back around in another way. So I feel like Tony's come around me for a while, and then this opportunity was the right time. 

Eleshia Harris: Definitely the right time. And it was the right time for me, selfishly. But also, just to really go back to the foundations of my work and just really recognize, huh. I've had so many aha moments. I don't even want to spoil it for people, but so many in my body, from my feet, we know that I put naughty feet. So using it on my feet all the way up my body and just the feeling of just being so connected. And the fact that I can travel with it. 

Brooke Siler: That's the coolest thing I can, why wouldn't I know. I know you just check them in, it can even go in carry-on. You can play with him in your seat. A big icebreaker.

Eleshia Harris: I love the way that it has come to fruition for you. And the fact that now, you're in that creative mode and you're creating exercises and so forth, for Tony, but also for the public. That's amazing. 

Brooke Siler: Yes. Everything I do, I like to think, it's not just for me. Originally, I was annoyed that I didn't have something that I could use between the legs the way I wanted. That was my original thought, just like, we need something smaller that goes above the knees. But what I've learned in the past three months or so is, God, this application goes so far beyond that. There's really no end. And what I'm excited about is, I'm excited to create the content that I'm creating and get a jump on everybody else. But I do want people to then show me what they got. It's for everyone. It's like, now you play, you show me because people are going to be super creative with him. There is no, you cannot. He inspires that. He inspired me to be creative. I definitely feel like every time I hold him, I'm like, oh. He's so tactile too. So yes, it's been a wonderful creative release for me because I haven't been painting or writing. But I'm someone who needs to always be creative in some way. And what I'm noticing about myself is that it takes many shapes and forms. The physical is also creative. Pilates is an art form in itself. I think Joe called it the art and science of Pilates, of Contrology. So it is an art, there is an art to it. And I find that when I'm doing a lot of Pilates, I don't actually paint or write. It's weird. It's like you can only do one artistic thing at a time. 

Eleshia Harris: But it's just amazing that you can jump from all of those things as well. And just because, again, PIlates it's what you do as a career, but it doesn't define you. And you do it on a day-to-day basis because you love it. 

Brooke Siler: I love it. And I fell back in love with it. And I think if, it doesn't sound humble but I don't mean it to not be, but I feel like I have been a very good example of what Pilates can do for you if you do it consistently. I've been doing it six days a week. And really, I also want to say that it's not six intense hours a week. What I learned is that when I was last year doing four and five hours a day, I was exhausted and I felt like a lot of the perimenopausal stuff was. I was just very tired. Let's just put it that way. And the weight wasn't shifting. What I learned was actually less is more. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes.

Brooke Siler: I know. What a great thing to realize. It was a hard lesson for me because I'm like, no, no, no, more is more. Of course, more is more. But more is not always more. In fact, when you start learning, as you know, all about inflammation in the body and reactivity in the body, I still move every day. But some days, it's 20 minutes. Some days it's whatever. But it's constant, it's consistent. But it's not intense the way I used to think it needed to be. And two stones dropped off my body, as we know, over the last couple of years. And this year alone, one of those stones. So 14 pounds for anyone who is a pound person. So that happened, obviously. I checked in with my food. I changed my diet with that new program.

Eleshia Harris: But also, you checked into what your body was telling you. So it goes back to what's working with your cycle as well. So you've been listening, even if you weren't doing it consciously, you were like, okay, my body doesn't need to be pushed. 

Brooke Siler: It's weird to work out every morning and then need to go back to bed. I was like, something's wrong with that. That can't be right. So when I pulled back a bit and I was like, oh wow, I'm getting better results. Now, that's not something for your average 20-year-old. Maybe, in my twenties and thirties, and even some of my forties, I could go full-on when I hit that mark. And I remember my sister-in-law telling me, she was 44 and she kept saying, you're not always going to be able to eat whatever you want. And I was like, we'll see. I totally thought I was going to beat the odds. Of course, I'm different, but I'm not. Give me a couple more extra years, and I didn't start until I was 46. But at 46, and sadly, my sister-in-law passed away, but I feel like she's giggling. I told you, you weren't going to get away with it. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes, but this is the reason why we talk about it. Because as you said, and as we've said previously if we are informed, then we need to inform others. And that's really important to me because only this year, have I been seeing more and more people talk about what we go through as female business owners. It's hard to keep all of our shit together, not knowing what's going on in the body and still run successful businesses, and still be a great partner. And if you've got the kids, be a great mom as well.

Brooke Siler: You'll find yourself looking at your husband and going like, I wonder what it would be like if I didn't have to feel all this stuff that I feel like month to month. It might be as relaxed as you are. You look really relaxed. 

Eleshia Harris: Especially when they have something silly to say at the wrong time of the month. 

Brooke Siler: I did a lot of apologizing. 

Eleshia Harris: So I always say to mine, you have 24 hours and you reset. I've got 28 days. I go for a full cycle every 28 days, so forgive me if I'm not the person that I was yesterday. 

Brooke Siler: It is fascinating. Every morning, my husband gets another report. I come in and I'm like, that was a great workout. I feel great. Or I'll come in and I go, I'm really tired this morning. I have a different every morning, and he just laughs because he's like, it's like the weather report. That's something different. I'm like, oh, I'm not feeling well. He's like, yes, you said that already. I'm like, yes but today again. Like I have a headache today or there are just these things. They're not all bad. I think when we take the judgment out of these, then let it just be. Like I have a headache, I'm not saying headaches’ a good thing, but okay, it's just a headache. Take a tablet or whatever, rub your oils. 

Eleshia Harris: You do whatever you need to do. I think that's a great thing that you do, that he's informed as well. 

Brooke Siler: I don't know if he'd agree with you. But it was funny the other day because I did have, the time of the month happened. And again, I'm 53 years old, Eleshia. And I could still say that it's still a surprise to me. I still feel like, God, why am I feeling this way? And then I get my period. How is that possible all these years? So I said to him, I went and I said, I'm really sorry. I burst out crying in the middle of the campus tour and I said to him like, yes. I don't even know if I apologized. I just said, well, I got my period this morning. And he was like, oh, I know. And I said, well, you know that I got my period? No, but I know you. He's paying attention. 

Eleshia Harris: That's what I love. I love that he's paying attention. It's important for both of you. 

Brooke Siler: And he did, he did hug me during that moment, so I'm good. 

Eleshia Harris: But we've been running for... 

Brooke Siler: Oh my God.

Eleshia Harris: I love it, but this is great. This is great. 

Brooke Siler: You're great. 

Eleshia Harris: So Brooke, you've told us about Tensatoner. Is there anything else that's coming up for you in the next couple of months that we should know about? 

Brooke Siler: Well, my website is currently being transitioned from a standard website, which was a brochure site with just a picture and hello, into a site that can now hold my videos. So all of the content that I'm creating now, the content that I've created over the last year and a half, in fact, will in November be loaded onto that site. And then it can live there, and everything can just be in one place instead of me doing what I did, which was one place was a book it's like, you play in one place, the videos in another. I got an email, so I'm hoping to streamline that. Really just the most important thing for me is that I am a mom and a wife and my kids are at very crucial stages in their schooling. And so, that is my main focus. And me, I am also the main focus in terms of staying balanced and taking care of myself. So those things are more important than the "things." The content, the website, whatever, but equally, it's lovely to have. 

Eleshia Harris: Oh yes, for sure. 

Brooke Siler: And stuff that I can share more freely of all the creative juices that are flowing through me. Sharing my juices.

Eleshia Harris: I'm going to have to ask, but will we be seeing any workshops or anything coming up anytime soon? 

Brooke SIler: I always have a few on deck. Not all of them have been agreed to. One of the things that's really important to me is to make sure that I'm taking part in events that are diverse in terms of racial diversity and also, inclusivity of different bodies, different voices that we haven't heard before. So I'm being a little more selective and I'm having bigger conversations. And there are things in the works for me around that as well, around that tOPIC. And again, that could be another conversation with you that we've had, but we could broadcast. So yes, there are some things, and I have had some wonderful Pilates people reach out and ask if I would do private workshops around with the Tensatoner at their studios. And yes, all of that to come. But again, it's really important for me to keep focusing back as I can run away with it.

Eleshia Harris: I love that you know your capacity, you know how far you've come from running a full-on studio that... 

Brooke Siler: That's a full-on full arm. 

Eleshia Harris: Yes. To know that you can scale back and look after yourself first, but also enjoy what you love doing. I'm just so happy that you're taking care of yourself. I'm so happy, but I'm also happy that I get to see your journey as well, and I get to be part of all of the fabulous things that are happening behind the scenes, so thank you. Thank you for having such an open heart. All right, where can people find you on your socials? 

Brooke Siler: So I'm Brooke Siler Pilates everywhere, and Brooke Siler Pilates on Instagram, so @brookesilerpilates. And I'm www.brookesilerpilates.com. If you want to find me there, and Facebook, I think I'm BSilerPilates. But it's not like you couldn't find me, but it's yes. The same name, staying consistent. 

Eleshia Harris: Thank you so much for this conversation, Brooke. 

Brooke Siler: Eleshia, thank you. I'm glad we finally figured it out. 

Eleshia Harris: Thank you. This has been such a great conversation. 

Thank you so much. 

Brooke Siler: I'm proud of you.

I really hope you enjoyed this episode of The Eleshia Show. If you loved this episode as much as I did, head over and rate and subscribe so you'll never miss an episode. New episodes drop every week on a Wednesday. I can't wait to hang out with you again soon. And lastly, remember to invest in yourself first because you are important and amazing. Take care. Until next time. Bye-bye.

Jenna and I on the Gold Digger podcast

When Jenna told me the date my episode was going to air, I shrieked and got to work to implement the podcast strategies she shared.

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